Monday, November 10, 2008
Panic Attacks: Like Death But Without The Death
So early last week I had my first real clinical panic attack. Not like a 'OMG Panic attack! LOLZ!' but more like 'Holy Shit I think I'm having a heart attack and I'm going to die!'
To be honest, I at first thought that it was some kind of heart attack, and I remember thinking how sad it would be for that to happen at only 27. After it passed, I got online and pretty much every symptom of a panic attack that one can exhibit, I had experienced.
Heart feels like it stopped, then heart was racing, flush, then burning up, sweating, can barely move, everything feels like a dream and in slow motion, electricity shooting all through my body, tingling all over.
I even had a nagging involuntarily spasming eyelid muscle 2 days prior, which apparently is a precursor.
While the initial attack was brought on seemingly at random, I found out in research that the first attack can set up a kind of positive feedback loop where one gets so worried about having another panic attack that they work themselves up into having another one. I can indeed agree with this, as anytime afterwards that I've had the slightest tingling in my extremities, felt flush, had an elevated heart rate ( even when warranted, like from physical activity) or felt kind of out of it, I freak out and think I might be starting to have another one.
The truth is, I would prefer to go to the doctor to make sure for a fact that that's all I experienced, even if just for peace of mind, but being broke and health insurance-less kind of makes that cost prohibitive.
Even if it was only a panic attack, it served as a sort of wake up call that I need to start taking better care of myself. I've been trying to eat more fruits and vegetables, stay away from junk and fast food, take a multi vitamin and get more sleep.
I do know that both my mother and at least one sister have dealt with panic attacks that felt just like I described mine. My mom was even rushed to the hospital the first time thinking she was having a heart attack.
Here's to hoping it was just a one time thing.
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1 comment:
Let's hope it was a one-time deal!!! Do you ever get any of the messages or texts I leave for you?
Also enjoyed your story about Kristy. :) hehe. Can't help but wonder where her church and God were when they had to cut a big meat chunk out of her leg? Must be Obama's fault.
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